


Needed to Hear Your Voice

by Impala_Chick



Series: Lose Your Mind and Come to Your Senses [5]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Dialogue Heavy, M/M, Miscommunication, Pining, Sad Ending, Steve Rogers and the 21st Century, Steve and Tony are bad at feelings, Voicemail
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-26
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-06-16 12:16:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15436854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Impala_Chick/pseuds/Impala_Chick
Summary: Tony leaves the compound without a word, and Steve tries to cheer himself up by listening to old voicemails, just because he likes the sound of Tony's voice.





	Needed to Hear Your Voice

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for indulging my headcanon whereby Steve and Tony have a personal falling out right before the events of Civil War. 
> 
> This has a sad ending but there is a happy ending in part six.

Steve didn’t see Tony for the rest of the work day. He figured he’d run into him in the halls on the way back from the training room, or maybe up in the ops office when Steve went to review fight footage from the Avengers’ last brawl. He knew Tony didn’t stick to traditional meal times, so he thought he might run into him in the mess hall when Steve dropped by to grab a handful of protein bars late in the afternoon. Steve even went out of his way to walk past the makeshift workshop Tony had set aside for his work.

But the work day had ended without any sign of him. Tony must have left already, without saying anything.

Steve walked briskly down the long corridor that led from the command center back down to the living quarters, resolutely ignoring his elevated heart rate and the tightness in his chest. He felt weird, like he knew he shouldn’t have expected anything from Tony but he still thought he deserved some kind of a goodbye. He nearly bumped into Natasha because he wasn’t paying attention.

“What’s up with you, Rogers?” Natasha asked him as soon as she saw his face. Steve shrugged nonchalantly.

“Nothing, Nat. Just a long day.”

“Sure, sure. We didn’t even leave the compound and nobody was attacked by killer robots, but definitely a long day,” Natasha joked.

Steve laughed weakly, unsure of what to say. He was definitely not moping, Natasha was just extremely perceptive. The smile slid from Natasha’s face as she watched him.

“Tony left already. But if you want to talk about whatever it is that’s going on -” 

Steve cut her off, annoyed that she was trying to bring this up in the middle of the damn hallway. 

“I don’t know what gave you the idea that there’s anything to talk about, but if it was Sam he’s totally wrong.” 

“Maybe it was the fact that Tony was totally wearing your shampoo and not his normal cologne today during the ops briefing.” Natasha shot him a look like she was not going to buy any more bullshit. Steve ran his fingers through his hair, taken aback that they’d been found out so easily. 

“Keep your voice down. This is not what I need to hear right now,” Steve muttered. 

“Then what do you need to hear?” Natasha asked, her voice soft. 

Steve looked up at her, but didn’t answer. Immediately he thought of Tony’s voice. Natasha looked like she already knew what he was thinking anyway, because she was just standing there shaking her head at him.

“I think you know how to use a smartphone by now.” Natasha smiled at him and reached out to gently squeeze his shoulder. Her voice sounded teasing and light, so different from her normal commanding tone.

Steve figured he must be acting really pathetic for Natasha to be taking it easy on him. He sighed heavily, embarrassed that he was the one in need of advice.

“Ya know what, Tony even trusts me to use the ones without actual buttons,” Steve joked, to break the awkward silence. 

“Atta boy.” Natasha punched him lightly in the arm, and kept on walking.

“See you at the gym tomorrow!” She called over her shoulder. 

Steve trudged back to his room, his phone in his hand. How bad could one phone call be?

He slumped on his bed, his back against the headboard, and scrolled through his contacts. His fingers hovered over Tony’s number, but he wasn’t ready to call yet. 

It wasn’t that he missed Tony, hell he’d just seen him that morning. But Steve did want to hear Tony’s melodic voice, because it was almost always upbeat. Hearing Tony talk always calmed Steve somehow, and that was the main reason he saved Tony’s voicemails. When he first found out voicemails were a thing, Steve was super excited about them. Not only could a message be sent instantly, but the phone could preserve the message in the sender’s voice. Sam and Nat made fun of him for enjoying listening to his voicemails, because apparently not many people liked receiving them, but luckily for Steve, Tony was not shy about leaving long, rambling voice messages.

So he opened his saved voicemail queue, plugged in his headphones, and pressed play. The first one in his queue always picked him up when he had a rough day, because not only did it bring back fond memories but it still cracked him up the way Tony casually said he completely customized the tower for them.

_Hey Cap, I know you are probably busy kissing babies or whatever it is you do in your spare time, but I wanted to make sure you knew that the tower has been totally renovated and you should really come check it out. In fact, you should really come check it out. But really, you should come check it out because I might have maybe built a custom floor? So let me know. Talk to you later._

Steve let Tony’s smooth voice wash over him, and he felt his annoyance from earlier start to melt away. Tony’s deep, rich voice always betrayed Tony’s emotions, and Steve found a certain comfort in that. The voicemails that he had saved were happy ones, with Tony sounding exuberant and pleased with the world. The first time Steve had heard the second message in the queue, he had just come back from a solo mission. Tony hadn’t known where he was, or else the message probably would have been less happy and more accusatory. 

_Okay Cap, I know you were just here a few days ago but you really need to come check out these uniform improvements I’ve made. I think you’re really going to like the material and the design, plus it’s a little more stealthy. Definitely versatile for missions. JARVIS says you told him you were going to be gone for a few days, but I think this suit will be worth interrupting whatever you got going. Anyway, let me know._

Maye Tony had known what he was up to, Steve thought in retrospect. The man was always too smart for his own good. Steve queued up another, this one from when they were attempting to surprise Nat for her birthday.

_So I’ve been rethinking this whole surprise-a-spy thing. She’s a world class assassin, we can’t surprise her. And on the off chance that we did manage to, she might whip out knives and kill us before she even realizes it’s us. No matter what Clint says, he’s like the least trustworthy source on this. We should maybe call it off. Or at least make sure Bruce is hulked out to shield us._

Steve laughed to himself. That birthday party had turned out to be a success, even though Nat definitely knew about it well in advance. Steve hit play on another, more recent message. He had this one practically memorized. 

_Cap, I think you should know that number one, I’m drunk right now. Number two, you make a really good leader and I’m glad you’re apart of the Avengers. Number three, it’s super fun to fuck you. Number four, did I mention I’m drunk?_

Steve smiled to himself and shook his head. It was silly to sit there and reminisce about Tony’s voice when he could hear the real thing.

The phone only rang once before Tony picked up. 

“Hey, handsome. Did ya miss me?” Tony drawled.

“Fat chance,” Steve fired back automatically. But he recognized Tony’s teasing tone.

“I know it was probably rude to just leave, but I had some urgent SI stuff to take care of and you know how those board members can be.” Tony’s voice sounded guarded, almost aloof. Like he was deflecting. 

“You don’t owe me anything,” Steve chimed in quickly, careful not to explain what he had felt earlier in the evening. He hadn’t meant to make this conversation turn into something accusatory. “I just wanted to ask how your day went.”

“Uh, well that’s sweet Cap. Really. But could we not do this?” Tony sounded annoyed and uncomfortable. His tone raised Steve’s hackles.

“Not do what exactly?”

“You know, talk to each other like we’re dating or something.” Tony’s voice sounded grating, which made his comment sting even more.

“We aren’t,” Steve replied flatly. 

“Exactly why we should maybe keep our distance.” When Tony spoke, it was like ice was injected directly into Steve’s veins and he started to feel cold all over. Steve needed to change the direction of this conversation before it was too late.

“You sure about that? Maybe this is something we should salvage.” Steve held is breath, and he heard Tony sharply inhale. Maybe Tony was actually considering it this time. 

“I don’t think so, Cap.” Tony sounded flat and distant when he finally spoke.

Steve felt his chest constrict. He shouldn't have held his breath. There had been no indication Tony was going to change his mind, and Steve had acted recklessly by even bringing it up.

“That’s it?” Steve asked, his voice a harsh whisper. He couldn't resist asking. They were in too deep to turn back now.

“We were never… this wasn’t going to work,” Tony said in a rush. Surely Tony had felt _something_ after all they had been through. But if he was going to keep deflecting, Steve wasn't going to be able to keep up the charade.

“Fine,” Steve spat. 

“Look, Steve. Can’t we just. Uh, friends?” Tony sounded hesitant and unsure now. That gave Steve a small amount of satisfaction.

“Maybe, Tony. Look, I’ve got shit to do.”

“And he cusses?” Tony tried to joke, but it sounded half-hearted. Steve didn’t think he could stomach much more of this conversation. He didn’t even try to give a cursory laugh. Tony might have been trying to smooth things over, but Steve didn’t know if that was possible at this point. He just felt so… _tired_.

“I’ll talk to you later, Tony.”

“Bye, Cap.” The phone call ended with a click, and Tony's goodbye had a finality to it that jarred Steve. It wasn’t quite the goodbye Steve had been looking for before, but it looked like that was the only one he was going to get.

**Author's Note:**

> Happy ending is in part 6!


End file.
